I don't have an issue with male comedians as a group of people. There are a lot of very funny men. My all time favorite comedian happens to be a man. And truly, who doesn't love Robin Williams?
But I also remember when I started into comedy...and how scared I was. Would I get heckled just for being a woman? I know some of this fear was completely irrational, but some of it was real. So, I found a comedy class in NYC for women (hold the eye rolls, they have their place), and I spent a lot of time, money, and energy juggling a career, family, and the commute into NYC to attend class for 6 weeks. It was hard. And not every funny lady can do that.
The class bonded. We had a fun graduation performance with a great tape- as promised. And then what? I could either continue to haul into NYC on a very regular basis to go to open mics, or I could find some where I live. The state of NJ has many mics, and many of them are wonderfully supportive and friendly. But some of them are not in the best areas - scary as a woman. Many of them are predominantly male, and it's hard to know if your breastfeeding joke truly isn't funny or if it's just not the right audience.
I was fine attending these random mics, for a little while. I had thought about starting my own, but wasn't sure I could do it. Did I have the talent? Would anyone come? Would I find a space that let me?
Then, I sat at a mic listening to a comedian tell jokes about hitting women. And no one said anything. No one really laughed either, but no one said anything. As a domestic violence survivor, I felt trapped and unwelcome. No one there knew my history. The joke was not aimed at me. But I firmly knew this wasn't my crowd.
And I know for many women, this isn't their crowd either. And it shouldn't have to be this way. So I started a Women's Comedy Mic. A supportive group of women who want to tell jokes and will support each other through whatever writing turns their comedy takes. The only rules are don't be hateful, and don't steal (I've seen that too - equally as icky). It's a small group, but it's starting to grow. And often non-comedians (i.e. our friends and families) come to be comedy guinea pigs.
So, if you are anywhere near Flemington, NJ, I invite you to join us. Every 2nd Sunday of the month at Flemington DIY. If you don't know how to start one, reach out. It's easier than you think - and I'd be happy to help you get one up and running. You can do it - I believe in you!
Be well,
Megan
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